TIGER MUST BE RACIST

I watched a report on ESPN’s Outside the Lines yesterday (which seems to be good for stirring up tensions where there previously were none), in which several white liberals and two mediocre black golfers (Steven Reid and some obscure golf instructor) complained about the lack of African Americans on the PGA tour, which, as a professional association, can only consist of golfers who golf at a professional level (as opposed to mediocre).

Once again, whoever slapped this little production together decided to ignore all the other minorities that excel in the sport (as they do whenever they bring up the lack of African Americans in NCAA football coaching positions, hockey, lacrosse, synchronized diving, etc.) – Asians, in particular, have taken the tour by storm (Choi, Kim, Maruyama), and the Spaniards and Latinos have always made their presence felt on the leader boards of nearly every tournament on tour (Garcia, Ballasteros, Olazabel, Villegas, Cabrera). I guess their skin isn’t dark enough to warrant any mention; either that, or the mention of that many successful minorities on the tour would undermine the report’s claim that the PGA (and golf in general) is backpedaling in this, the Golden Age of Diversity (which is another way of saying the PGA is racist).

And conveniently, Vijay Singh is left out of the equation completely when the report mentions Tiger Woods as the lone African American on tour (ironically, Tiger doesn’t even consider himself African American, having coined the term “Cablanasian” to explain his racial heritage, which includes African-American, Native-American, Asian, and Caucasian ancestry). I guess when you consider that Vijay is from Fiji, the claim that he is not African American is technically correct. But I thought we were dealing with racism on tour, which has to do with the color of one’s skin, regardless of where or how they inherited that color, be it on an island, in the Far East, the Southern Hemisphere, or on real live African soil. Or does ESPN believe racism only applies to those of purely African descent (although I have a feeling the Chinese, Japanese, Irish, Poles, and Jews might not agree with that)? Maybe ESPN also had a hand in writing the L.A. Times article that claimed Barack Obama was not “authentically black,” seeing as they’ve also placed poor ‘ol Vijay into the same category.

But does all this talk about race really matter in this day and age? Especially in regards to modern-day sports? Julius Erving, the lone voice of descent on the show (which also means he was the lone voice of reason), suggested that “sports are a meritocracy that rewards those who succeed, regardless of their skin color.” Hmmm…what a novel concept! Does that mean the golfers who are on tour earned the right to be on tour because they are better than those who aren’t on tour? You mean Brian Whitcomb and Tiger Woods didn’t collude to hedge up the way for other aspiring black golfers to get their Footjoy’s onto the pristine fairways of the nation’s elite courses?

I have an idea: instead of wasting energy by trying to find others to blame for his lack of success on the tour (among the others he blamed was, shockingly, Tiger Woods for not using his influence to temper the flames of racism that rage among the PGA’s “powers that be”), Steven Reid ought to be working on his short game. After all, it was he who missed a 10-foot putt in a tournament on the 18th green that would have earned him his PGA Tour card; not Tiger Woods or the racist “powers that be.”

And instead of wasting money and energy on these haphazard featurettes, which seem to be little more than 10-minute nuggets of good old-fashioned propaganda, ESPN could spend it teaching and developing young black golfers, if they really were concerned about the lack thereof on tour. But ESPN is less concerned about the racial disparity in golf than they are about legitimizing their own network by pandering to the hyped-up, bloated reputation of racism in today’s society. By so doing, they give themselves a sense of morality that would otherwise not exist in this age of White Guilt.

So give yourselves a pat on the back, ESPN, for being champions of the cause, for putting Truth in its rightful place beneath the all-important virtue of Diversity, as you so often do.


Douglas W. Bailey
dwadebailey@gmail.com